


SAT Prep

by lil_utterance (persephone_flees)



Category: Glee
Genre: F/F, Femslash, First Kiss, Friendship, Slushies
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-07-08
Updated: 2010-07-08
Packaged: 2017-10-10 10:58:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,695
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/98995
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/persephone_flees/pseuds/lil_utterance
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's an interesting set of questions...</p>
            </blockquote>





	SAT Prep

**Author's Note:**

> Note (1): the format of this fic is not quite standard, but it does eventually make sense! ;)   
> Note (2): the question types used in this fic are adapted from sparknotes.com

**SAT Prep**

****
    
    
    Each passage below is followed by questions based on its content. Answer the   
    questions following each passage on the basis of what is stated or implied in that   
    passage and in any introductory material that may be provided.
    
    
    Brittany and Santana are the two individuals who set the standards for popularity 	  
    	at McKinley High School. Attractive, powerful, and irresistible, there is not a 	  
    	single student at the school that could be classified as out of their league. Having   
    _Line_ 	recognized their unified potential at a young age, the two girls will continue to   
    _(5)_	perfect their use of the joint seduction as a tool for achieving their goals. Goals   
    	which, while they may fluctuate from year-to-year, always include becoming   
    	co-captains of the Cheerios, having the hottest dates for prom, and generally   
    	ruling the school. Before ever setting foot in McKinley, Santana told Brittany 	  
    	that they should make their last several years in Ohio memorable; because, after   
    _(10)_	they graduate, no one in their hometown is likely to hear from them again. They 	  
    	are not, and have never been, Lima losers. Leaving will be the next step in their 	  
    	self-definition.   
    		Not that having the unassailable power to define themselves hasn't come  
    	without either battle or cost. Keeping Coach Sylvester placated and off their   
    _(15)_	backs frequently seems like a full-time job. But they manage it, and they manage  
    	it well, and somehow they even manage it in style. Joining the Glee Club should   
    	have been a form of social suicide, but after overcoming obstacles, mostly by   
    	convincing everyone around them to meet their own expectations, they have  
    	emerged unscathed, their reputations intact.  By not giving up, not giving in - not   
    _(20)_	submitting - they are able to have it all: the social benefits of popularity, the   
    	fulfillment of geekier pursuits. Every day as they attend their practices, they   
    	dance two dances, well-versed in the choreography of both worlds. And even if 	  
    	the unthinkable happened and one of them were to miss a step, the other one   
    	would be there, helping them to resume the count.  Together, they cannot fail.  
    

 

***
    
    
    Which of the following best states the main idea of the passage?
    
    (A)	Brittany and Santana are the hottest girls at McKinley High School.  
    	(B)	Coach Sylvester can sometimes be frightening.   
    	(C)	Most of the occupants of Lima are losers.  
    	(D)	Brittany and Santana's successes are due in large part to their friendship.  
    	(E)	Memorizing choreography is hard. There are always so many steps.   
    

***

_They were lying spooned together underneath Brittany's comforter. _

Santana felt warm and sleepy, too relaxed to do more than smile at the soft path Brittany's fingers still traced up and down her thigh. Usually it was Santana who led their interactions both in and out of their respective bedrooms, but occasionally Brittany was adamant about sharing--and tonight had been one of those nights.

Although it had been Santana who initiated their make-out session earlier, the minute they started to lie back on the bed Brittany had taken over, shifting to straddle Santana's hips and pressing her into the bed. When Santana had tried to flip their positions, Brittany refused to play along; instead she reached up to gently pin Santana's wrists above her head.

"Stop that," she said, leaning down to trail soft, butterfly kisses along Santana's cheek. "I should get a turn sometimes too."

Santana couldn't deny her then; she never could. It's an unspoken rule that she's not even sure that Brittany knows.

What Brittany wants, Brittany gets.

It was a policy she'd instituted years ago, back when they were both in junior high. Then, as now, Brittany never asked for very much. It was one of the things Santana loved so very much about her; one of the reasons they became such good friends. At the time they met, Santana hadn't felt like she'd had much to offer. It was a time pre-popularity, pre-cheerleading uniform, pre-puberty. It sucked, and she wasn't in the mood to give anyone what little she had to call her own.

And then she met Brittany. And Brittany never asked for anything.

Instead, within five minutes of meeting the tall blonde outside homeroom, Santana was already eating half of one of her Twix bars and flipping through several of the fashion magazines that Brittany always had stashed in her backpack.

It was a pattern they'd repeated almost every day for the rest of year, varied only by the types of candy Brittany managed to procure and the dates of the magazines.

They'd gotten to the pictures of prom dresses before Santana recognized a need to give back. She'd been reading an article about embarrassing prom nights and started laughing so hard that she almost choked on the gum she was chewing.

"How did you read this without laughing?" she asked Brittany, who had recently been flipping through the exact same issue.

Brittany had been watching her closely since she started coughing, but now she looked back down at the magazine in her lap and shrugged.

Santana folded some pages back so that she could point out the article. "It's hysterical," she said, waiting for her friend to respond, to read the lines now marked by the side of her finger.

"Oh." Brittany smiled in a vague sort of way. "Okay."

"Don't you want to read it?" Santana asked, feeling disappointed. It was something she thought that Brittany really would have enjoyed, an instant inside joke, something that they could have shared...

She watched as Brittany focused on her own magazine, flipping pages as she scanned through the pictures, occasionally tracing the outlines of photographs with her fingers.

Santana's realization hit her suddenly, so jarring that she didn't have time to edit her response.

"Don't you read the articles?" she asked.

Brittany blushed. "I like the pictures," she said, stubbornly refusing to meet Santana's gaze.

"Don't you know how to...?"

"I can," Brittany said quietly. "I just don't like to."

Santana stared at her for a moment, uncertain as to how to proceed. Finally, she tilted the magazine back up towards her face, and started to read aloud. "So, I decided to let my boyfriend choose the color of the dress I wore to our prom..."

About halfway through the story, she finally chanced a glance over at Brittany. The other girl sat there, her mouth slightly agape, her eyes riveted on her friend. When she saw Santana watching her, she smiled and then scooted over closer so that they sat hip-to-hip on the ground outside the classroom, their arms linked together. When Santana finished the article and went to turn the page, Brittany tilted her head to the side until it came to rest on Santana's shoulder.

It wasn't until later that Santana would marvel about how little she'd had to give for such a very large gain.

***
    
    
    Correct Answer:** D**  
    _(Brittany and Santana's successes are due in large part to their friendship)_  
    

***
    
    
    Which of the following was not listed as one of Brittany and Santana's goals? (lines 5-10)?
    
    (A)	obtaining attractive dates for prom  
    	(B)	becoming co-captains of the Cheerios  
    	(C)	generally ruling the school  
    	(D)	learning to be nice to others  
    	(E)	eventually leaving their hometown  
    

***

_Slushy dripped down Rachel Berry's face as Puck stood by helplessly._

"I can take the football team," he said to her quietly, "but I can't hit a girl."

"I'd like to see you try, Puckerman," Santana said, the empty paper cup gripped tightly against her side, blue liquid dripping down her fingers. Her aim had been unerring for the facial, but now she felt her hand shaking and hoped that no one could tell.

"Look, Lopez," he began, but Rachel grabbed his arm and shook her head, blinking up at him through the mess that covered her face.

"I'm fine, Noah," she said. "I've got a change of clothes." She shot Santana a look. "It's not like anything you say is going to make her regret her actions."

"Yeah, I'm really sorry that I can't be your teachable moment for the day, Berry. Guess you'll have to find someone else to lecture. Good luck finding someone that will listen."

At her words, Rachel's face started to crumple. It was obvious she was trying to control herself, but she was quickly losing the battle, and for the first time in the altercation Puck looked truly incensed.

"We're a couple, Santana," he said, moving into Santana's space. "Get used to it. Everyone else has."

Santana laughed. "That's her third slushy facial of the week, so I'd hardly call you the new 'it' couple."

"They have a name for us," Rachel said, her chin tilting up defiantly.

"Puckleberry? It's a fruit, not a nickname." Santana crossed her arms over her chest as Puck put his arm around Rachel and started to lead her away. "Finally," she said, "go be gay with manhands where we don't have to watch."

"I don't get how that would work." Brittany's voice came from behind Santana as she walked up to join the group. Instinctively, Santana found herself moving to one side to make room for her, even as she wanted to roll her eyes at the question.

"I'm not sure it would," Rachel said dryly. She wiped some slushy out of her eye.

"Santana and I have gay sex," Brittany informed her. "If you need any tips-"

"Brittany!"

Brittany looked over in surprise at Santana's tone. "What? We're really good. I thought I could help." She looked over at Rachel again with interest. "I really like your sweater. Though it does sort of look like the kitten is drowning right now." She looked back over at Santana. "Next time I would use a different color slushy--drowning kittens is really creepy."

"I..." Santana found herself at a loss as to the appropriate retort, and Rachel and Puck didn't seem willing to wait around for her to find it. They started to walk away and Santana barely waited until they were down the hall before turning on Brittany.

"What?" Brittany asked, seemingly perplexed by the glare being directed at her.

"You complimented her sweater." Santana shook her head in irritation as Brittany's stare remained blank. "You approved of an item of Berry's wardrobe."

Brittany shrugged. "Kittens are cute." She stared at Santana for a moment, apparently waiting for some type of response. When none came, she frowned. "You think they're cute too. You took me to that pet store last month."

Yeah, because I knew you'd like it, Santana thought, but she didn't say anything, just moved towards her locker. Brittany followed.

She waited until Santana had started pulling out her books before she spoke again.

"I'm glad you're not dating Puck anymore."

Santana paused in the act of sliding a book into her bag and looked up in surprise. "You are?"

"Yeah. He's a total Lima loser." Brittany started to fidget under Santana's scrutiny and looked away. "We're still getting out of here after graduation, right?"

Slowly, Santana nodded. She hadn't even known the idea meant that much to Brittany. Sometimes it was hard to tell what would capture her imagination.

"Awesome. Do you want to go see the kittens again?"

And then again, sometimes it was not very difficult at all.

"Sure," Santana said, smiling for the first time that day.

Brittany grinned back at her. "I knew you liked them too," she said, and this time Santana did not even consider denying it.

***
    
    
    Correct Answer:** D**  
    _(learning to be nice to others)_  
    

  


***
    
    
    In the second paragraph, the passage implies that Brittany and Santana's feelings toward Glee Club could be most   
    accurately captured by which of the following?
    
    (A)	They unequivocally approve of it and love all of their fellow club members.  
    	(B)	They hate it and are just looking for an excuse to leave the group.  
    	(C)	They want to remain members despite the fact that it is not the popular choice.  
    	(D)	They are still hoping to destroy it and claim their reward from Coach Sylvester.  
    	(E)	They are using the club to prepare themselves to audition for American Idol.  
    

***

_Santana didn't know when she first realized that she liked Glee Club. _

She'd known for weeks that Brittany already loved it. There were costumes and there was dancing, and that was really all it took for her. Amusing Brittany was not a difficult task to undertake, and if Mr. Schuester had been actively trying to seduce them away from the Cheerios and into Glee, he could not have been more successful. Kurt's offer of a costume with feathers had clinched the deal. Santana had seen the way her friend's eyes lit up at the suggestion and had known that she was irrevocably lost.

Santana had been a harder sell. She had more ambition than Brittany, and with Quinn's fall from grace, there was a vacuum of power that she knew had been made for her to fill. Not only did the Cheerios need a new captain, the school needed a new female leader. Really, the only part of her life that made her claim more tenuous than it should have been was this damn club that she had been made to join. The sooner it was gone, the sooner she could bounce; and the sooner she could end up where she belonged.

But then it got complicated.

Maybe it was that she had always, secretly, loved to sing. Maybe it was that Mr. Schuester didn't have the same appetite for public embarrassment as Coach Sylvester...though she did think it a weakness of his that he did not require a higher level of perfection from his club's members.

Maybe it was because glee practice was the first time she'd felt comfortable laying her head on Brittany's shoulder in public without it being for the benefit of an audience.

Whatever it was, she kept having to think up cleverer and cleverer ways to keep Coach Sylvester's plans from succeeding. And she didn't know how much longer she could manage her deception before she got caught.

"You should be weeping with shame," Coach Sylvester told them, as Brittany and Santana sat in front of her for their weekly lecture. "And if those tears aren't composed of blood, my disappointment will be indescribable."

Brittany looked alarmed at the possibility - though whether it had to do with the tears or the disappointment, Santana wasn't sure - so she reached out and grabbed her hand, lacing their fingers together discreetly, the gesture hidden by their chairs.

"Dismissed," Coach Sylvester said disgustedly, already ignoring them as she opened a book on her desk and started to write.

That was when Santana really decided. She wasn't self-destructive.

Brittany liked Glee. She liked Glee.

So, she would do her best to make sure that Glee continued to exist. Openly, if need be.

Even if Coach Sylvester would make a formidable enemy.

***
    
    
    Correct Answer: **C**  
    _(They want to remain members despite the fact that it is not the popular choice)_  
    

  


***
    
    
    Which of the following best explains Brittany and Santana's reasoning with regards to their use of joint seduction (lines 3-5)?
    
    (A)	it is a useful means to en end  
    	(B)	it is the only way to attract a boyfriend  
    	(C)	they like the taste of cherry chapstick  
    	(D)	they regret having ever engaged in the behavior  
    	(A)	it is a great way to learn new techniques  
    

  


***

_Though Santana would never admit it, sometimes she finds herself in awe of Brittany. _

They're sitting on the floor of Santana's room, giving each other manicures while some reality television show plays in the background. They're mostly ignoring it, using the noise to mask their conversation topic in case Santana's mom walks by.

They're talking about sex.

"You asked him to what?" Santana had heard Brittany's request clearly, but she still couldn't believe... "And what? You're saying he did it?"

"Why wouldn't he?"

"Because it's gross."

"Why?"

"It's an armpit!"

Brittany shrugged. "But it feels good."

Santana concentrated on the clear coat of polish she was applying to Brittany's nails to give her a chance to process that logic. "How did you get him to agree to it?" she finally asked.

"It gets me hot. Guys like that. Also? Sometimes I think they like it when you don't make them guess what turns you on. They get confused."

Brittany recognizing confusion in others...it made Santana wonder what had happened to her neatly organized world.

She was quiet long enough that Brittany appeared to take her silence for disapproval.

"I kiss them afterwards, so I know what it tastes like," she reassured Santana. "It's not so bad."

Santana nodded, but didn't look up from the hand she was finishing. When the last fingernail had been painted, she capped the bottle of polish and lifted up Brittany's hands so that she could blow on her nails to dry them. Brittany sighed happily at the sensation, and Santana looked up just in time to catch her smile.

"You've never asked me," Santana said, not letting go of her hands.

Brittany shook her head. "No. I can't--you distract me too much."

"I distract you?"

"Yeah. You make concentrating really hard. Like when we kiss in front of other boys...I forget whether or not I'm being sexy."

Santana smiled, pleased. "I wouldn't worry about it too much."

"Really?"

"No. I mean, c'mon, would my best friend ever be anything but hot? I have standards, you know."

"But I don't have a good score." At Santana's mystified look, she tried to clarify. "The one you want all your boyfriends to have. It comes on a piece of paper and I think there are numbers."

Santana started laughing."I could care less about your credit rating, Britt," she said, trying to sound serious so that Brittany would believe her. "Now, if you're done being ridiculous, would you like me to give you a pedicure too?"

"Okay. But use the sparkly kind this time."

Shaking her head and still laughing, Santana reached for the glittery blue polish.

***
    
    
    Correct Answer: **A**  
    _(it is a useful means to an end)_  
    

  


***
    
    
    The author's description of Brittany and Santana being 'well-versed in the choreography of both worlds' is an example of a(n)
    
    (A)	irony  
    	(B)	metaphor  
    	(C)	paradox  
    	(D)	hyperbole  
    	(E)	allusion  
    

  


***

_Their first kiss was peppermint candy, sweet and spicy and unexpectedly perfect. _

It was around Christmas time, and Brittany's mom had allowed them to have a dish of ice cream covered in creme de menthe with all the rest of the adults at the end of the holiday dinner. Afterwards they had gone up to Brittany's room to download apps onto Brittany's new iPod and talk about Santana's upcoming date.

"Where are you going?" Brittany asked, handing the iPod to Santana.

Santana scrolled through menus until she hit Brittany's Lady Gaga playlist. Already knowing she had her friend's approval, she selected the newest album and then put the iPod into its dock. She might be excited by Brittany's new acquisition, but she had her priorities straight.

"We're going bowling with his friends," she said, joining Brittany on the floor so that they were sitting side-by-side, leaning against the bed. "And then I guess we'll go somewhere alone."

"And?"

"And what? I never say 'no'."

"Yeah, but he's a senior. We're only freshman."

"I caught that, Britt." Despite her nonchalant tone, Santana was actually really pleased to have captured a popular senior as a freshman. Ever since she agreed to the date, the looks of hate directed her way from the girls in the classes above hers had been indescribably epic.

"Won't he be, like, really experienced?"

Santana shrugged. "Probably."

Though her tone was equally bored, she felt nowhere near as much assurance on this topic. She'd been out with a few good looking guys, sure, and none of them had complained - far from it - but this one was different.

This one was almost out of her league, even on her best days, when she was wearing her Cheerios uniform. She found she didn't like the feeling much.

"I learned something new when I went out with Brad," Brittany said, referring to the junior she had seen once or twice before he transferred schools.

"Was he good?" That would explain why Brittany had looked so wistful for the first few weeks after his transfer. Santana had always found him almost insufferable; barely popular enough to bother with and oddly obsessed with some type of geeky internet game.

Brittany nodded. "He did this thing with his tongue when we kissed..."

"French kissing's pretty standard, Britt. I would ditch the first model that came without it."

"Yeah, but he was just...better...at it."

"Explain."

"I...can't." Brittany looked momentarily distressed, but after a moment's thought her expression changed. Brightened. "I could show you."

"I-" It wasn't gay if it was for educational purposes, right? Her popularity might depend on this knowledge. And it was only Brittany, anyways. They were best friends. "If that's the only way you can tell me, fine," Santana said, turning to face her.

If she felt any hesitancy at the idea of kissing Santana, Brittany didn't show it. She reached up with one hand to cup Santana's face and then they were kissing, Brittany's tongue tracing delicate patterns on the roof of Santana's mouth. Without even meaning to do it, Santana shifted her body closer to Brittany's and made a noise that sounded vaguely approving. Reading the sound as encouragement, Brittany continued the kiss for a bit, making sure that Santana felt each stroke of her tongue, only appearing to lose herself at the very end, when she whimpered and and threaded her free hand into the dark fall of Santana's hair. The kiss got a little sloppy then, but in the good way, a little uncontrolled, a lot enjoyable.

Santana hadn't expected that, hadn't expected the enjoyment, and the fact that they were both apparently experiencing it made her pull back. For several moments both of them simply stared at each other wide-eyed, their breathing quiet but still audible.

"Was that...ok?" Brittany finally asked.

"Yeah," Santana said, the only response she could manage as she realized the minty taste in her mouth was not only from the ice-cream she'd eaten. She didn't know why, but that thought, more than any other, made her realize that she regretted the end of Brittany's tutorial way more than she should have.

"I thought it was pretty sweet," Brittany offered. "Even better than with Brad." She suddenly had an odd look on her face, similar to the one that Santana had associated with her earlier wistfulness over Brad's departure. "I guess we can't do it again, though."

"Probably not." A possible out occurred to Santana and even though she knew she was reaching, she went for it anyways. "Unless you want me to teach you something too."

Brittany's nod was so eager, Santana knew she was not alone in what she was now feeling. It was both scary, and comforting. Also: really, really hot.

Not letting herself think about it too much, Santana leaned towards Brittany, who met her half-way. This time Santana made sure the kiss began with their mouths closed, only slowly deepening the contact. When she finally coaxed Brittany's mouth open, the other girl moaned, and the sound of it almost made Santana forget they were just supposed to be kissing. The feel, the taste, the sweetness, her friend--

Peppermint candy.

***
    
    
    Correct Answer: **B**  
    _(metaphor)_  
    

  


***
    
    
    The term "fluctuate" in line 6 most closely means
    
    (A)	vary  
    	(B)	beguile  
    	(C)	stupefy   
    	(D)	repudiate  
    	(E)	consolidate  
    

  


***

_Santana impatiently checked the time on her cell phone again. They were going to be late to the game. She sighed. She supposed it was time to test and see if Britt's reading comprehension had improved. Also, her ability to answer a cell phone._

There was a reason the two of them never sexted. It was rarely a fulfilling experience.

"Where r u?" she texted. She told herself to give it five minutes before she sent another one. Sometimes it took Britt awhile to cycle her way through the keys.

Five minutes later, no response.

"Ur going to get us both killed," she tried this time.

Once again, nothing.

"Lopez," Coach Sylvester hollered from the field, using her bullhorn. "If you're not over here in five minutes, the next time I send your uniform in for dry-cleaning, you will still be wearing it. My guess is, you can't take that kind of heat."

Santana gave up then and moved toward the squad. There was nothing she could do now; Brittany would have to face Coach Sylvester alone. The punishment seemed out of proportion to the crime, but she guessed they'd both chosen to wear the uniform.

Partway through the game, Brittany ran onto the field. Coach Sylvester immediately intercepted her but before she got more than a few words into her tirade, Brittany pointed towards the bleachers and at Becky, who was sitting off to one side, her arm newly-cast. Though her face remained thunderous even after the explanation, Santana could tell that their Coach's fury was now faked--especially since she let Brittany join them on the field, an unheard of allowance for squad members who arrived any later than five minutes before game time.

At the half, Brittany was all apologetic about missing Santana's texts, but Santana wasn't in the mood to hear her excuses.

"Yeah, whatever," she said, as she walked over to the concession stand to buy a diet coke. Rather than follow her, as she expected, when she looked over Brittany was back at the bleachers with Becky, touching her cast and asking questions and looking serious and altogether un-Brittany.

...or else very Brittany. Santana could never decide.

Right now, watching her friend, she felt furious and touched and proud and ashamed and all the conflicting emotions she had learned, to her surprise, could be elicited from her by a single individual. Her friend.

She would always love her--and she would always be jealous of her. Jealous that she could engage in forms of conduct that - if attempted by anyone else at this school - would be effective forms of social suicide.

Just then, Brittany looked away from Becky and over at her. And smiled.

Santana allowed herself a single eye-roll and changed the number of cokes she was ordering from one to three.

She wasn't being nice, she assured herself as she walked over to the bleachers. She just had a duty to Brittany. Her presence would be a form of damage control.

She would have sworn she saw Coach Sylvester smile at her as she handed Becky a soda.

***
    
    
    Correct Answer: **A**  
    _(vary)_  
    

  


***
    
    
    The author's tone in this passage can best be described as
    
    (A)	sarcastic  
    	(B)	skeptical  
    	(C)	dramatic  
    	(D)	pessimistic  
    	(E)	none of the above  
    

  


***
    
    
    Correct Answer: E  
    _(Santana simply couldn't figure out any other way to help Brittany study)_  
    

  


***

"Okay, now let's try a real question," Santana said.

"Wait, we're not actually on the exam?"

"No, Britt." It had been a long night of studying, something the two of them rarely did, and Santana found herself irritated beyond belief. "God," she muttered, as she slid the next stack of papers in front of them, "sometimes I wonder how you even manage to get up in the mornings."

Rather than be offended, Brittany took the question seriously. "I think of ducks," she said, earnestly. "Or other birds. Maybe kittens."

Santana smiled, her mood already shifting. Brittany's cluelessness never ceased to be oddly adorable. She should have known that the most likely answer to her question would have been a list of Brittany's favorite things; she had, after all, frequently been there when Brittany woke up to list them.

"Alright," she said, unaware that Brittany wasn't done. "I get it-"

"Sometimes," Brittany said, interrupting her. "I even think of you."

Santana stared at her a moment before shoving aside the stack of papers in front of her and reaching a hand out to Brittany to lead her upstairs.

After all, they still had plenty of time before applications were due; SAT prep could definitely wait.


End file.
